- Be Prepared for Anything
This first learning started shortly after I found out I was pregnant. One week after I did, the global COVID-19 pandemic was announced. Then, a few months after that, the hospital I was going to deliver at changed their maternity wing into a COVID wing, which resulted in me having to find a new gynecologist and a new hospital to deliver at.
Everything I saw on TV growing up about the pregnancy journey was different. I could only have one visitor when my son was born, so the whole scene in my head of the Father of the Bride Part II where the whole family is anxiously standing by in the waiting room didn’t happen. All of my visions of going to lamaze classes were thrown out the window as they were all canceled. Touring the hospitals also wasn’t an option. And never did I think I’d be delivering a baby with a mask on!
- Prioritization is Key
Take it from me, I’ve been working since the day I turned 14, and have not stopped. I managed to keep a full-time job after having my son, and recently even got a promotion in under two years. It can be done. My husband and I don’t have family nearby or utilize daycare, but we have learned how to prioritize and set tight schedules. Yes, that might mean doing less things in the evenings to focus on work or learning to listen to zoom calls while working simultaneously, but it’s doable. Each night, I set my priority list in my Franklin Covey planner the night prior. It helps clear my head before I go to sleep, and I waste no time the next day in having to decide what to do next.
- Read The Ingredients in Everything
This is another one of those leanings that started during pregnancy. Before being pregnant, I heard the major big no-no’s, like alcohol, drugs, sushi and certain cheeses. But cold cuts, medicines, cesar salad (learned this one in the third trimester – oops!) caffeine intake, and if you want to be extreme like my doctor was, hair, nail and makeup products should be avoided when possible, was all new to me.
There was a day in age when I thought giving up alcohol on weekends was going to be the hardest part of pregnancy, but that was a piece of cake compared to not being able to take my decongestant allergy medicine, coffee when I could barely keep my eyes open just driving to work, and not to mention my inhaler when I was wheezing just going up the stairs the last few months of pregnancy.
In addition to all of that, I started an obsession with downloading apps like Think Dirty®, that rates the safety level of personal care, cleaning and food products. This became a good obsession though, one that has continued when my son was born. His 1-year old Clifford birthday cake that I baked, was made with dye from beets rather than red dye 40. I’ve learned so much about ingredients over the last few years, and I’m grateful for the knowledge to be able to make healthier changes for my family.
- Organization is Life-changing
In these years of my son being a baby, and now a toddler, the thing I yearn more of is for time. Time in the day to get everything done. I’ve found by being organized, and listening to podcasts on organization while I walk my dog, has truly been life-changing. For daily tasks, I’m obsessed with the Any.do app. I have a personal account and a workspace account. With the personal account, I can quickly add tasks from my phone and utilize their color tags for organization. Any.do makes it easy to set reminders and recurring options. I have even added file attachments, so nothing gets lost. At work, I utilize the Workspace Any.do account, which allows my team to have a board for each of our projects and track everyone’s status in seconds. It’s simple and super fast. My team has found that it saves us time, and avoids going back and forth with each other, and can instead glance at the specific board to see the status of any project at any given time.
I also have a shared Google calendar and photo albums with my husband to keep us on track. I made a shared invite for each of my son’s pediatrician appointments, and in the body of the invite, throughout the time between appointments, we would both list any questions we have for the doctor on the calendar invite. This way, when it came time for the doctor visit, all the questions we gathered for that month were right there in the shared invite. If one of us couldn’t make the appointment, the other one knew which questions to ask. We also do this for vet visits for our dog and cat.
I’ve organized my son’s clothes by age and then within that, by seasons. Up until 2, most of his clothes only lasted 3 months, but it was such a relief when he turned 2, as the clothes last a whole year! Shoes are another story…
A portion of my kitchen is dedicated to my son Preston, as it has his bottles, bowels, utensils, toothbrushes, daily vitamins & medicine, etc.. All in one place, with most in a high cabinet. I’ve kept his medical files in folders labeled by year, and his doctor visits are documented in a Google calendar where I can go back to see the history of his height/weight, and all the many questions I’ve asked the doctor. I found it hard to ask questions, and then write or type the answers while holding my baby and looking at the doctor, so I started audio recording the visit and utilizing AI later to transcript the audio to text, which has helped immensely at both doctor and vet visits.
- Always Think 3 Steps Ahead
When I had my son, life became like a game of chess. When we went somewhere, I would look at the weather, anticipate how long we would be there, and then envision everything that could happen or go wrong. For example, if the event would overlap with his nap time, I would need to think about where he would sleep and what he would need. If we were eating out, would they have high chairs or should I bring his to-go booster seat. Snacks were something I would bring regardless, and always a tone of extra bottled waters. I started packing an extra outfit for him and myself, since he would not only pee through his outfits, but also through mine on occasion. I also bought a LifeVac choking device, and then ended up buying two more, so that I had one at home, and one in each of our cars.
- Don’t Compare Your Kids to Other Kids
It’s easy to get into the mindset of comparing your child to everyone else’s, as you may think it’s the way to ensure you’re doing things “right.” And while, it’s OK to gather information about how many words your kids say, weight and height, and sleeping patterns and nap times, it’s equally important to know there isn’t just one “right way.” Every child is truly different, and learns and grows at their own pace.
On a regular basis, I was asking my Mom friends what percentile their kids were in for height and weight, and how many words they were saying. And then at one point, I realized I’m driving myself (and them) nuts. My son started out small, and although not in a high % for height and weight, he’s able to wear his clothing for the entire time it’s meant for, plus some additional months, so there are perks, and pros and cons to everything. And he might not say as many words as some of the other kids his age, but he understands a tremendous amount and can put together puzzles meant for children twice his age. Then there’s the whole daycare or no daycare debate. For personal reasons, I decided not to put my son in daycare, and at times I think he will need more advancement in social aspects, and some required training such as using the potty. However, do you really think if they don’t learn how to potty train at exactly 2 and half years old, then they will forever be wearing a diaper? Another big comparison amongst new moms is TV-time. My doctor suggested no more than 1-hour a day. If my son only watched 1 hour of TV a day, then I think I would have torn out all my hair by now. I have a Google Home device, and my son loves it. He chooses his own games and YouTube videos now. Some of his favorite videos are extremely educational, in which he’s learned the alphabet, songs, and colors. Why stop something that is helping him learn? Like adults, every kid is different, and has unique traits and abilities.
- Make Time for Yourself and Don’t Lose Who You Used to Be
Throughout pregnancy, I gained over 45 lbs. Well it was during COVID, so I have somewhat of an excuse. The mixture of fear of leaving my house much during the pandemic, and the pains I got when doing an ab workout the first month of pregnancy, scared me into not much movement at all. Then after my son was born, work, pumping and well the baby, took up all of my days. It wasn’t until my son was a little over 2, when I decided that’s it, I needed to look and feel how I used to. Just like a work meeting, I scheduled one hour increments on my calendar everyday for physical fitness. I let my husband know, and after explaining how much it meant to me, he agreed to always be available to watch my son for my “workout hour.” I had friends and family that told me to throw out my old clothing that doesn’t fit, and that I will now need “Mom clothes” and will never be back to my old size again. Well it was not easy, but I’m happy to report I’m back to my pre-pregnancy weight, fitting back into most of my old clothes, and taking it a step further, and trying to get into the best shape of my life to be even healthier and stronger for my family.
I might not be able to dance my heart out at the club as much as I used to, but I’ve found something more enjoyable now, which is to take my son’s hands and spin around and around the kitchen singing “Ring Around the Rosie.”
- The Days Go by Slow, but the Years go by Fast
Some days seem like they go on forever, and when I’m drained I find myself staring at the clock counting down the minutes until bedtime. However, once my son is in bed, then I’m on my phone flipping through his photos missing him. He’s almost two and a half now, and I really don’t know where the time went. I’m trying to do a better job of taking more videos. I take many photos, but videos are something I wish I had more of, and from the videos you can take screenshots of them to make photos!
And by the way, I’m also a cat and dog-Mom, and have found many of these tips are also applicable to being a fur mom!
I sometimes say things like “when I get the new, larger house,” or “the more time I’ll have when he’s in school,” but then I remind myself to live in the moment and enjoy every second I have now, because there will be a time when I look back and forget these times. Living in the present is the best present anyone can gift to themselves. Happy Mother’s Day!
For any questions, comments, or if you would like to collaborate, feel free to contact me at MommyLifeSimplifed@gmail.com
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